Perspective is a beautiful thing

Every person makes mistakes, but mistakes don't define you. What you do afterwards - does - at least for a period of time.

There are so many different people in the world; leaders, innovators, narcissists, thieves, murderers and everyone else in between. No one office if it is big enough, is full of 'nice' people - because everyone has their 'shit'. That's a fact. Some people applaud a colleagues success, while others have pangs of jealousy and some act out.

Some people just don't want others to be successful, liked, rich, smart, beautiful or talented. They feel inadequate when people with any of these qualities are around.

Others do not like who they see in the mirror. They change their faces and bodies because they cannot see their beauty inside. The botox and fillers, with puffed up lips and a boob job, only show the rest of the world just how much they are struggling with who they are. A person who truly likes themselves and can see that every person is beautiful in their own way, often excels far more than those who have to change what they look like and end up looking plastic.

We are all to blame for this, because anyone who buys magazines, newspapers or watches television that showcase people of influence with any of the above, is telling the mindset of those watching that that is what it takes to be successful or beautiful.

Instagram and photographs in general are so airbrushed, filtered and altered today - that people have become afraid to show their real selves.

What can we do to help others believe in themselves and the qualities that make them unique and beautiful? What is it that we are doing to change this mindset? Can we do anything at all - or do we just have to sit back and wait for the time to turn?

I don't know the answers but what I do know is that we need to push people up when they are down. Be there for those who may not have been there for us, just because they need you and they are human beings at the end of the day.

Support everyone around you and understand that beneath the facade there is a person that is probably scared, vulnerable, insecure or perhaps the opposite - happy. Better understanding emotional intelligence will make you more forgiving, kinder and more aware of what is going on around you. I've done a number of things to make my life happier, and it includes some big, bold moves:

• Stop being afraid of what people may say, and stand up for the underdog
• If someone is down, no matter whether they have been kind to you in the past or not, be there for them. Show them that you are a person with compassion and understanding
• Reach for the stars but know that you are still successful if you don't quite reach them
• Be kind no matter what, and be generous. If you can afford it, always be the first to pay for a bill or buy someone a drink
• Know that some people are not what they seem, and make sure they earn their stripes before coming into your trusted circle
• Contrary to the above, trust everyone until they do something that screams 'do not trust them'
• Only have people around you that share your same values
• Live in the moment and dream about the future - but forget the past - successes and failures
• Remove clutter in your life, and that includes people
• Use your time wisely. Not everyone deserves your time as it is your most valuable commodity
• Put yourself out of your comfort zone as often as possible
• Travel and experience life
• Remove all negative influences from your life. You only need a handful of family and friends to be happy

I remember about five years ago laying in bed talking to the person I was seeing at the time, and he said every single thing that I wanted to hear: He wasn't interested in money, he wanted to give away all of his money to help the world be a better place, family is everything, he wanted to work on his 'cold' persona and be more open, he likes being private...

You know what... he was telling me everything I wanted to hear. There is nothing wrong with that, but none of those things are that person. He wasn't secure in the real person that he is. He needed attention, and he spent as much time as humanly possible away from family by choice, and if he had coffee with someone he knew had no money, he would still make them go dutch. He dined at a friends restaurant who he knew was going broke and always walked out without paying. That doesn't mean anything other than if that is who someone is, then own it. If you are happy with the person you are - own it. If money in your mind defines you - then that's ok too. We are not all meant to be the same. While it is warm to hear people say that they are family people - if you are not, just don't say it. Say that they are an accessory, and what someone is meant to have, but you would prefer to be at a nightclub somewhere else in the world. 

I believe in perspective and I absolutely believe that people should be who they are. I am the first to admit I have faults, but every single day I try consciously to be a better person and every day I do acts of kindness to strangers because it makes me feel good. I have no idea if it makes them feel good, but it certainly makes me feel amazing, and I go to bed at night feeling content.